Title: If She Seems As Lonely As Me, Let Her Sink (The First Love Remix)
Author: balefully
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 4,800
Disclaimer: A product of my fevered imagination.

Summary: Jared figures out he's gay and decides he'll just put his romantic life on hold until he makes it big. But then he meets Jensen, and a wrench gets thrown in the works.

Notes: Written for j2_remix. I was assigned the inimitable chash (i.e. longsufferingly), and spent about eighty years just going through her enormous catalogue of fic to pick one for remixing. I cannot TELL you how difficult it is to remix an author as amazing as she is. It has been a humbling experience. I settled on If She Seems As Lonely As Me, Let Her Sink, and decided to do a prequel of sorts. Thanks so much to rivers_bend for the beta!

(  Jared is sitting on Alexis Bledel's couch when he realizes he's gay. )

Title: Fill My Little World Right Up
Author: balefully
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Words: 6,830
Disclaimer: All a product of my fevered imagination.

Warnings: JUST DON'T READ THIS. AT ALL. NOBODY. EVER. It involves D/s and enemas and watersports and petification and impregnation kink and itufghj. Oh god, kill me now.

Summary: There is just. So much disgusting porn. I am mortified I'm even posting it. It is VERY IMPORTANT TO NOTE that this is from an existing universe where Jared and Jensen are in a pre-established D/s relationship involving pseudo-puppyplay. So if anything doesn't make any sense, that's probably why. :< In this universe (which is technically non-AU), Jensen is Jared's puppy, Jared likes to take care of him, and Jensen wars with feeling like he is bad and sick and wrong for loving it. This fic is a whole lot of grossness and a whole lot of schmoop and pretty much nothing anyone would ever want to read.

Notes: OMG valiant, I LOVE YOU. Words cannot express it. :3!! This is entirely for Edie, and I cannot believe I finally finished it. And that it is almost 7,000 words. Weep. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME, SHORTY. I was going to post it at blindfold_spn so I could get it out there and yet not have my name attached, but it's really too long for that. Also that's cheating, since I've been working on this for months and months and months. PLEASE DON'T JUDGE ME OH GOD I CANNOT BELIEVE I AM POSTING THIS. Thanks to beckaandzac for the last-minute tweaks!

( The boxes start coming on a Wednesday. )

Title: We Flow Together (Once and Forever)
Author: balefully
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Words: 35,300

Summary: As a child, Jensen Ackles was saved from drowning by a mysterious boy who appeared from the depths off the coast of Cape Cod. Now a grown man, Jensen is an actor in New York City, living off a trust fund from his parents, and convinced he's incapable of true love. One fateful night finds him back in Cape Cod after a raucous party gone wrong, fighting for his life as he sinks beneath the waves. Yet again, he's saved from a watery grave—this time by a naked man, seemingly mute and more beautiful than anyone Jensen's ever seen. The stranger decides to call himself Jared, and as he and Jensen spend time together, learning each other body and soul, Jensen finds that his own capacity for love is as boundless as the ocean.

Jensen's world comes crashing down around him when he discovers the origin of Jared's strange naiveté and lack of inhibitions—he's a mermaid, fins and all. After Jared is abducted by researchers who subject him to cruel tests, Jensen must make a crucial decision: will he risk everything to finally find true love—with a fish—or will Jared be the one that got away?

Disclaimer: Based on Splash, the 1984 Touchstone film starring Tom Hanks and Daryl Hannah. I own nothing; this is all a figment of my fevered imagination.

Notes: Written for spn_j2_bigbang. Infinite thanks to everyone who listened to me bitch and moan and especially those who were cheering me on right down to the wire. You know who you are. Biggest beta thanks to rivers_bend, valiant, and mediaville. Lots more love and acknowledgements in the Author's Notes at the end!

Art by cathybites


( We Flow Together (Once and Forever) )

Title: God Made Boston On A Wet Sunday
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Words: 8,750
Disclaimer: Sam and Dean are sadly not mine.

Warnings: Sam is 17.

Summary: Sam and Dean live in an apartment in Boston while John is away on a hunt. Money is scarce, so Dean picks up a particularly slutty part-time job. Sam finds out.

Notes: For fluffyllama as part of spn_j2_xmas. I used two of your prompts, the sense-of-place one and the sort-of-hooker!Dean one. PLUS I tried to work in some of your likes, like possessiveness/obsessiveness, wet boys, gunporn, and carporn. I am SO SORRY this is late, OMFG. :( I hope it is at least not awful. Just so you know, though, this is a second attempt at your gift. My first attempt ended up being soooo huge I couldn't even get it properly started by the deadline. It's becoming my Big Bang, though, so. :D You'll get it eventually. Also, title from a quote by Raymond Chandler, and huge thanks to rivers_bend for the read-through!

( They live in an apartment this time, sparsely furnished and molding in the corners where the plaster is cracked and damp. )

Title: That Frenzy of Mutual Possession
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Words: 6,777

Warnings: Underage Sam! Spanking!

Summary: Sam and Dean move to Colorado when Sam is 14 and Dean is 19. Sam is confused and horny, Dean is worried and jealous, and they both work themselves up until they can't hold back anymore.

Notes: For merepersiflage, who wanted "spanking, bottom Sam (14 and over)...[and] Dean and Sam doing something domestic." I hope this fits the bill, darling! :D! Thanks so much to my lazy_daze for the great beta as per always, and to everyone who helped me out with this and answered my lame questions. You know who you are! <3! Title from Lolita, by Vladimir Nabokov. Holyoke and everything in/about it is totally real.

( They moved to Holyoke, Colorado, on a Wednesday at the tail end of January. )

I know I just posted "fic" yesterday, but this is REAL fic, ahaha, and not aodsgnsiendgkl insanity in fic form. SO hopefully you are not sick of me yet. Anyway, REMIX WAS SO AWESOME, and thank you to cathybites for being cool and running a wicked challenge.

Title: Faded from the Winter (The Driftwood and Indra Remix)
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Words: 4,620
Disclaimer: Sam and Dean are sadly not mine.

Summary: Sam has faith that Dean will return, no matter how long he may be lost.

Notes: Written for spn_remix. I remixed Faded from the Winter, by memphis86. Originally posted here. Remix title taken from Thoreau's Walden. Thanks to the lovely backinblack and kittyzams for the beta!



( Dean's been gone for weeks... )

WHAT IS THIS. THE PORN JUST RAN AWAY WITH US. DON'T JUDGE PLEASE.

Title: The Cure For All Of My Blues
Authors: balefully and girlmostlikely with help from sloane_m and aynslee!
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Words: 2,680
Summary: Jared has an enormous cock. Like, really, really enormous. It causes him lots of problems until Jensen comes along to properly enjoy it.

Notes: We were chatting about Jared's enormous cock and how he must've inherited it from his Polish ancestors, as suggested by the country statistics in The Penis Poll. Things got out of hand as we posited that it must be too big for most girls, but that of course Jensen is a total size queen, so it's a match made in heaven. I took all of our contributions from chat and stitched them together into a massively porny and completely plot-less little fic for Ginger, so. SHARE OUR INSANITY. This is a multi-author work, so I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE TO BLAME. Title from "Enormous Penis" by Da Vinci's Notebook.

( Jensen managed to beg out of a network party under the pretense of studying up for a part he wants to audition for over hiatus. )

OH MY GOD I DO NOT EVEN KNOW. What am I doing. Um. Basically, everyone was really really really excited about some 4.01 stuff that I wasn't totally 100% on-board with, so I decided to write a coda to help myself get into it. And it is the most random thing I have ever written and I am not entirely sure how I feel about it, but WHATEVER. Here it is anyway.

Title: Miserere Nobis
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean( spoiler )
Rating: NC-17
Words: 4,000

Summary: ( This is a 4.01 coda, and therefore spoilery! )

Disclaimer: Sam and Dean are sadly not mine.

Notes: This is all backinblack's fault. Thank you to my lazy_daze, as always, for making it not suck (...as hard), and to valiant for listening to me whine and throw a fit. <333! ILU ALL.

( The last time they spoke, it was in a pool hall... )

Just reposting my h/c ficlet, as the premiere is obvs TOMORROW and this is post-s.3 and will therefore be obsolete in a matter of HOURS. *_*! Sadly, I had about half a post written up already about some other stuff that I was going to save for later, but in all the c/p-ing excitement, I lost it all. SIGH.

Title: You Can Go Home Again
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: PG-13
Words: 1,725
Summary: After Dean comes back from hell, he and Sam find home again. Written for girlmostlikely's hurt/comfort meme. SCHMOOOOP.

( He wakes up in a crypt. )

Title: Almost At Home
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Words: 24,302

Summary: Sam graduates from high school in early June in rural Tennessee. He and Dean start the summer with an all-nighter of celebration; the day after, while both fight hangovers, John calls to assign them their first hunt by themselves. They go to northern Virginia to investigate the homicidal ghost of a dangerous escapee of a high-security prison and mental institution whose MO is beheading people with an axe while wearing a filthy, grotesque bunny suit. Then throughout the long, happy summer, as they move around tackling a series of minor hunts together, John's absences grow longer. Sam and Dean explore their relationship as it burgeons into something they've both been craving and which neither of them regrets.

Warnings: None; Sam is eighteen.

Disclaimer: Sam and Dean are sadly not mine.

Notes: Written for spn_j2_bigbang. Infinite thanks to everyone who listened to me bitch and moan and especially those who whip-cracked and encouraged me to keep on keepin' on (causeways and memphis86, I am looking at you in particular). And love as usual to lazy_daze for a brilliant beta and the best cheerleading/ego-stroking ever. <333! More notes and acknowledgements at the end.

Graphics, Art, and Soundtrack by dark_reaction

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Art and Soundtrack Post

( Part 1 )

Almost At Home

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Art and Soundtrack Post

( Part Two )

Almost At Home

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Art and Soundtrack Post

( Part Three )

Title: The Last of the Romantics
Author: balefully
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Words: 29,300

Summary: Jared is the son of the Ackles family's chauffeur, and has been in love with Sandra, the Ackles's adopted daughter, all his life. He goes to London to find himself, and comes back a changed man. Sandra falls in love with him at long last, threatening her financially advantageous engagement to Jeffrey Dean Morgan, the heir of Morgan Industries. Jensen, her older brother and the CEO of the Ackles Corporation, must devise a plan to keep Sandra and Jared apart so his carefully plotted merger can go through as intended. His own machinations backfire, however, as he learns the meaning of love, selflessness, and what it's like to truly need someone else.

Warnings: Extreme schmoop.

Disclaimer: Only a product of my fevered imagination. All recognizable lines (including the title) are "borrowed" from Sabrina, the 1995 film, starring Harrison Ford and Julia Ormond, or from the 1954 film, starring Audrey Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart, both by Paramount. All brands and locations belong to their creators, etc.

Notes: Written for Sweet Charity for the extremely generous and patient pinkfinity. She requested a Jsquared AU based on the film Sabrina, and while I played havoc with some aspects of her request, I hope this is at least a passable offering. <333! It's really more of a remake than just an AU based on a movie, as it very closely resembles the original, and in fact utilizes a fair amount of the more iconic dialogue. All the places (restaurants, London landmarks, etc.) are real, and so is Giles Hattersley. Thanks INFINITELY to backinblack for the World's Fastest Beta! <333! And to those of you who offered when I begged so prettily. ;)! (And to lazy_daze, who swooped in to save me from typo hell at the last second. MWAH.)


Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3


( Part 1 )

The Last of the Romantics

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

( Part Two )

The Last of the Romantics

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

( Part Three )

Title: So Quit Asking Me
Author: balefully
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: NC-17
Words: 2,205

Summary: Sam and Dean are bored on a long drive, so they decide to play a little game. Things get interesting.

Disclaimer: Sam and Dean are sadly not mine.

Notes: Written for my Sam's 25th Birthday Drabble Party in response to deirdre_c's prompt: "Sam/Dean, accidental (or "accidental") groping". Thanks to causeways for the inspiration and wee beta! <3! The Awkward Game is totally real! Title from "Awkward Game" by Gabriella Cilmi.

( They're heading west on Route 66, clear across the country from St. Louis all the way to LA. )